You want to co-sleep but your partner says “no, no kids in our bed!”
This is a quite common scenario and it can create problems in the marriage if you don’t solve this issue in a respectful and working way. If the mother doesn’t want to co-sleep things are pretty easy to work out. The father might have great ideals of everyone sleeping together but if Mom can’t handle it he most likely will let her decide.
It is more difficult when the father doesn’t want to co-sleep. In this situation the mother might move to her own bed with the kids and this is very hurtful for Dad who gets to sleep alone.
It is very important to remember that things are not black or white and kids grow up. Still, during those years that co-sleeping is a possibility you need to work out a good plan for how. Listen to each other and try to make a compromise. Perhaps you can co-sleep in one room and have your own bed in another.
If the father feels that the mother only partly co-sleeps and then joins him he won’t feel as abandoned, especially if he knows that they have an agreement to do things this way till the kids sleep through the night.
Kids do enjoy co-sleeping but kids also need happy parents that respect each other. It is not worth making a fight over this issue since the most important is for the kids to grow up in a harmonious and respectful environment where they can develop into harmonious and respectful adults!